Miraculous Reveals
by lalagirl16
Summary: Reveal one-shots of all kinds for all of your Love Square needs! Please submit prompts in your reviews and I will happily write them! Now Playing: Ladybug is tired of secrets...and she begs Chat Noir that she can figure out his identity before he can find hers!
1. Nyan Chat

Adrian had always had a gut feeling that Ladybug would find out his secret identity one day, whether she wanted to or not. He was fairly certain that they attended the same school, due to how quickly both of them would show up to fight off any akumas, so he suspected maybe one day she would recognize him, or his voice. Or maybe he would slip up and make a pun, or pair any chivalrous task with a elegant "Pleasure, M'lady," before realizing his slip up. There was also the fact that their transformations were short lived after battles, and both were always worried that they wouldn't be able to get out of sight before reverting to their civilian forms. And considering how lazy Plagg was, it was a constant concern of his. But MY GOD if this wasn't the STUPIDEST POSSIBLE way to have his identity revealed to Ladybug.

-The previous night-

Ladybug and Chat Noir were perched near the top of the Eiffel Tower on a particularly starry night after an hour or so of patrolling Paris. Ladybug was hesitant at first, ("Chat that's so freaking cliche! Ugh...At least it's better than you hitting on me during battle…") Both were grateful for each other's company though, and the night seemed too peaceful and quiet to simply sleep through. Chat Noir's ring beeped and he immediately excused himself to go feed his ever-hungry, cheese-loving kwami. And Marinette just had to seize the _golden_ opportunity to get back a her partner for all the puns, flirting, and other obnoxious behaviors of his she had to endure. He had left his phone behind.

Normally, she would have left it be. Ladybug believed that their secret identities were an essential part of their partnership, and she didn't wish to have her identity discovered or know the identity of her partner. His phone would have his name all over it. If she wasn't careful, she wouldn't be able to unsee any revelation. But it was open to settings, he had recently used it to turn of his location services so he couldn't be tracked. (Overprotective parents, maybe?) There wasn't much she could find out here. She picked it up, and evil smirk crossing her face. But what to do…

Taking a bunch of random pictures to spam the camera roll was a classic phone prank but it could be potentially dangerous for him, were someone else to discover those pictures. Or there could be a picture of civilian him that would immediately pop up. No, she couldn't do that. Then it hit her. The perfect idea to embarrass him. She quickly made some...adjustments to his phone, snickering all the while. She then turned it off and laid it back down where it had been. Immediately on cue, Chat Noir came bounding back over the buildings, landing with cat-like grace next to her so they could continue their conversation.

He didn't check his phone again. Not once. Their conversation was so friendly and engaging that by the time they decided to part ways and head towards their respective homes, Marinette almost forgot about her little prank. _Almost._

-Earlier that Morning-

Adrian was regretting staying up so late last night. It was just his luck (damn you Plagg!) that there would be a History pop quiz today. He must have been daydreaming yesterday because he had no idea what half the things even were. A quick glance around the classroom let him know that he was not the only one who was blanking. Everyone was scratching their hands, tapping their pencils, and staring blankly at their unfinished papers. Well, expect Chloe. She was looking at her nails. Even with the ambiance of stress, the room was nearly silent. Adrian was desperately hoping for something, anything to break the icy silence. Of course Murphy's Law had to go and kick him in the balls.

 _Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan…_

Everyone's heads instantly jerked up. Adrian laughed to himself. Who could possibly have such an _embarrassing_ ringtone? And that's when he noticed that his bag was vibrating against his leg.

 _...Crap._

Cheeks as red as Ladybug's costume, he casually leaned down to turn off his phone, ignoring the call from Nathalie. Everyone in class was holding back laughter...except Marinette, who just kind of looked horrified. But she usually looked like that around him so he didn't think much of it.

"Very funny, Nino," he grumbled, louder than needed to so that his classmates knew that he did not willingly use that awful song as his ringtone. It was kind of ridiculous that it was set to Nyan Cat of all things. He laughed to himself. It was almost as if someone...knew…

But that was ridiculous! It was just a coincidence was all. Besides it was a well-known, annoying song, and it really didn't have THAT much to do with cats.

"Hand in your papers!"

Adrian looked down. His paper was still half finished, he hadn't realized how much time he had been sitting there, panicking. At that moment, the bell rang, ending History class and commencing their lunch break. Adrian quickly circled his educated guesses for the last few questions and handed it to his teacher as he left the classroom, Nino by his side.

"Dude, who changed your ringtone? That was hilarious! Right in the middle of a quiz too!" Adrian raised an eyebrow at his friend.

"I thought YOU did."

"Nope. Wish I had though. You should have seen your face! You looked as embarrassed and flustered as Marinette when she tries to talk to-" Nino was swiftly dragged away by Alya before he could finish. Adrian didn't go after him, mostly because he was too caught up in his own thoughts. Who could have possibly changed his ringtone if it wasn't Nino?

"Hey!" He was immediately snapped out of his thoughts at the sight of Marinette, blocking his path and looking timid, angry, and confused at the same time...somehow.

"Hi, Marinette," he returned, still a bit out of it.

"I need to talk to you." She seemed a bit uneasy, as though she were trying to convince herself that they needed to talk rather than him. And it was freaking adorable.

"Sure." Adrian abandoned his train of thought and followed Marinette behind the school, where they could talk privately. Marinette triple checked that no one was around. She was going to go check one more time, but she looked too paranoid for her own good, so he broke the ice by clearing his throat and saying, "So…"

"Ichangedyourringtonelastnighti'msorryididn'tknowthatthiswouldhappen!"

"What?"

"I changed your ringtone," she repeated softly. "Last night." Last night? He hadn't seen Marinette last night. And he certainly hadn't left his phone anywhere; he liked to think he was more careful than that.

"What?" he repeated.

"I changed your ringtone last night and I'm sorry that I did but I just thought that it would be funny and it was!" she blurted in a rushed, run-on sentence.

"You've lost me Mari."

"Come on...you like cat jokes." Adrian froze.

"What?"

"You see it's funny because...you know…"

"What?"

"You're...Chat Noir."

"..." Adrian did NOT know how to respond to this. None of this was making any sense to him. How the heck did she know? He didn't really realize that he was staring at her, jaw dropped.

"W-what?" she asked timidly.

"Isn't that my line?" he countered, raising his eyebrows up and down and giving her a sly smile. (It was reflex, okay?) Marinette's unsure expression dropped into a scowl.

"Yep. It's you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

 **Thanks for reading! Please leave me requests! I can do reveals to anyone, in any way shape or form! Please review too! :)**


	2. Match-Maker Alya

**Thanks so much for following and favoriting! Keep the reviews and requests coming!**

 **This one-shot was requested by Guest.** _ **Alya figured out Ladybug's identity long ago, when Stoneheart attacked at the beginning of the school year. But what will she do when she finds out Adrien is Chat Noir? Will she try to set the love square straight or will she stay silent?**_

"Marinette, did you see that totally awesome video I got of Ladybug last night? She and Chat Noir finished off that akuma in record time last night! So cool!"

"Heh heh! Yeah...she's pretty...um...cool all right! I guess you got a pretty good view of the action!"

 _Not as good as your view, girl_ Alya thought to herself. She loved to tease Marinette by mentioning Ladybug in front of her, snickering to herself at her friend's oh-so-smooth reactions when she mentioned her secret alter-ego.

"Speaking of views…" she responded slyly. "Are you enjoying yours?" Her eyes flicked mischievously over to where Marinette's attention had been focused all period: Adrien Agreste. Alya watched her best friend snap out of her daze, face tomato red.

"I'm not staring!" she whispered back furiously. Ayla rolled her eyes. Marinette was a girl with a serious problem. It was beyond her how her friend fearlessly fought the forces of evil on a daily basis, yet couldn't be helped to ask her crush out. Or even talk to her crush in complete sentences. Maybe crush wasn't the right word; Adrien was Marinette's _obsession._ Alya felt bad for her friend's partner Chat Noir, who had made many obvious moves on her, yet was rejected bitterly every time. Whoever was under that black mask was funny, chivalrous and brave, and very handsome. _(Even though Alya was dating Nino she had to admit that black leather still made her swoon.)_ He also obviously loved Ladybug, taking some of the worst hits for her without hesitation and sticking by her side through thick and thin. Alya had come to the conclusion that her friend gave Chat the cold shoulder because she was 120% focused on Adrien.

Alya let out an audible sigh as she jotted down the assigned homework on the board in her planner. Thinking about her friend's love life made her want to interfere, though she had promised herself that she would never approach her friend about her double life. If Marinette hadn't confided in her about Ladybug, then she obviously didn't want her knowing, and Alya respected that. But she still couldn't shake the feeling that Marinette was making a huge mistake. As her BFF, it was her job to supervise Marinette's love-life, and she felt like a failure.

The bell suddenly rang, granting the young teens their freedom from school for the day. The two friend walked out of the school and through the streets, on their way to Marinette's house to hang out. It was then that Alya got an idea to test the waters.

"So Mari, I need your opinion on something," she told her friend vaguely.

"Okay, go."

"Why do you think Ladybug always rejects Chat Noir?" The rhythm of Marinette's steps suddenly shifted, indicating that the question had made her freeze for the briefest moment.

"Why are you asking me?" Marinette responded apprehensively.

"I can't figure it out! Chat Noir is so brave, kind, and handsome, yet Ladybug is always so cold to him when he flirts! Why doesn't she at least throw him a bone?"

"He's a cat, Ayla, not a dog," Marinette deadpanned.

"It's an expression and it's beside the point!"

"Okay…" Marinette said, holding up her hands in defense. She was silent for a bit a they kept walking, probably trying to think of a good way to phrase her answer. "Maybe she doesn't think of him in that way." That wasn't it. Marinette's tone was off...usually how it was when she told a half-truth.

"Come on, girl," she teased. "You've seen them. They have _great_ chemistry and they both know it."

"Maybe he makes too many puns for her. Maybe she just hates puns."

"The puns are adorable!" Alya countered. "He obviously makes them just to tease her!"

"Maybe Ladybug's allergic to cats!" Marinette said with a giggle.

"Be serious!" Alya joked back. After the laughter died down Marinette was silent for a bit more. Finally she spoke again, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Maybe...there's someone else. You know...in her civilian life." That was it; Alya's suspicions had been correct. She needed to get her friend a man. Whether she needed to push Marinette to ask Adrien out or forget about him, she wasn't sure, but she wasn't going to sit and let her friend remain stuck between two guys. Maybe she could do it without mentioning Ladybug at all. She had a plan. She would convince Marinette to ask Adrien out, and if he rejected her, she would encourage her to find someone new. Maybe then she would give Chat Noir a chance.

"Mari-" she started, but she was cut off by a loud smash, as the building across the street was crumbled to pieces by...a giant unicorn? That was new. Of course an akuma would attack now, of all times.

"I'd better go film this!" she told Marinette, running away quickly so her friend could go hide and...become Ladybug? Alya still wasn't really sure how it worked. She still wanted to find a safe place to film the fight. Doing her best to ignore the satanic neighs, Alya dodged into an alleyway and hid behind the remains of a demolished building. She turned on the camera on her phone and zoomed in to watch the fight. The akumatized victim was a little girl who looked about seven, who was controlling the monstrous unicorn by reading from a storybook.

"Listen, sweetie!" Marinette yelled at the child, swinging her yoyo around her to fend off the dancing silverware from _Beauty and the Beast_. "Just hand me your book and I'll make everything better!"

"MY NAME IS STORY-TWEL...TWEL…"

"Story teller?" Chat Noir asked as he hit the unicorn in the face with his staff.

"STORY TWELLER!"

"Geez, Hawkmoth needs to step up his villain names. This one's not very creative," Alya heard him joke.

"And then, a huge dragon came! And it stole Ladybug and Kitty's mirwacu...miraculaa…"

"Miraculous?" Chat Noir helped again, letting a smile creep on his face.

"DRAGON! STEAL THE MEAN KITTY'S RING!"

As the young girl had commanded, a dragon suddenly appeared and began lighting all surrounding buildings into flames, all the while advancing towards Chat Noir. Alya cringed. Chat was barely fending off that horrific unicorn on his own. There was no way he could fight both monsters at the same time with Ladybug preoccupied. She was trying to get the book from the little girl, but was constantly being attack by various fairytale creatures which slowed her down considerably. When she saw the peril that her partner was in, she ran the other direction and used her trump card.

"Lucky charm!" she yelled, throwing her yoyo into the air. It turned into can of hairspray. Ladybug picked it up, clearly confused.

"Little help here!" Chat Noir called, trying to pin down the demonic unicorn with little success and the dragon gaining on him.

"I've got it!" yelled Ladybug in triumph, looking down at the hairspray again. Unfortunately, this caught the attention of Story Teller.

"No! No! No! Bad Ladybug is messing up the story!" the little girl screamed.

"Chat Noir! Get the dragon to breathe fire at you!"

"What do you _think_ it's been doing all this time?" he retorted. But he obliged and began to taunt the large reptile, leaping on top of cars and leading it over to where Ladybug had indicated.

"Do it!" he yelled as he saw the dragon preparing to roast him. Chat Noir jumped out of the way in the knick of time as Ladybug used the hairspray as a makeshift flamethrower to redirect the flames toward Story Teller. The young girl gave a shriek and used her large storybook to shield her from the stream of fire. When it stopped she realized it had spread to the pages. Story Teller dropped the book in horror, which Chat Noir immediately kicked over to Ladybug.

It was a large, thick book, (which was also on fire,) so Ladybug seemed to be debating how she could destroy it. Chat Noir noticed this and came to her rescue.

"Hang on M'Lady!" he said, giving her a wide smile. He summoned his Cataclysm and destroyed the book, leaving only the akuma sitting in a pile of ash. Ladybug cleansed the akuma, released it and threw the hairspray in the air with a cry of, "Miraculous Ladybug!" All the building were repaired, the fire extinguished, and the monsters removed. The little girl was returned to normal, and her minor burns from her defeat were also healed with the magic.

Ladybug and Chat Noir shared their signature fist bump before Ladybug gestured to her earrings and ran away from the scene almost immediately. Alya didn't miss the wounded look on Chat Noir's face. _I'm rooting for you, Chat_ , Alya thought to herself. She looked down at her phone and scrolled through the video. It wasn't bad quality. She was a little farther back from the action then she would have liked, but it was still a good record of the fight and she had stayed same throughout the duration. She opened her browser on her phone and was just about to post the video to the Ladyblog when she heard someone land in the other end of the alleyway. She glanced in the direction of the sound to see Chat Noir leaning against the side of a building, looking exhausted. Then there was a flash of green light, and there, in Chat Noir's place, stood Adrien Agreste.

 _HOLY CRAP ALL OF MY SHIPPING DREAMS ARE COMING TRUE_ was the only thing she could think of.

"Ack!" Adrien jumped back in surprise. _Crap!_ Had she said that out loud? Alya stood frozen, not really knowing what to do. Adrien was Chat Noir. _Adrien_ was Chat Noir. Adrien was _CHAT NOIR._ She had figured out Ladybug's identity almost immediately; Marinette looked so much like Ladybug and they were never in the same place at once. Now that she thought about it, the same was true for Adrien and Chat Noir. Why hadn't she noticed that?

"You! What? How? Cat? What!...You!" was all she could get out, though her brain was computing a mile a minute. _God I have literally become Marinette._

"Alya!" he hissed. "Did you follow me? Did you _film_ me?" He was eyeing my phone.

"No! Nothing like that! I was watching the fight from back here! You came out of nowhere! I still can't believe you're Chat Noir! Have you always been Chat Noir? Why do you never make puns at school?" Adrien cut Alya off by covering her mouth and looking around with paranoia. After triple checking all around him, he let her go.

"Alya, you need to promise me you won't tell anyone!" he whispered desperately. "Please it's very important that my identity remains a secret! Besides, Ladybug would kill me if she found out…" Alya was barely listening. This was perfect. Marinette and Adrien were made for each other, and they were already in love! They just...didn't really know it. They were in a love square! She had to tell Marinette! She had to tell Adrien! But...she couldn't! Then she got a terrible idea.

"I'll keep it a secret on one condition…" she said slyly. Adrien tensed up.

"This is blackmail!" he stammered. "Come on, Alya!"

"...you have to come to the movies with me and Marinette," she stated. Adrien blinked.

"Wait. That's it?"

"Yeah," Alya responded. "What were you expecting?"

"I don't know," he responded. "Something more...evil? Not that I want to give you ideas!" Alya was secretly enjoying seeing him this flustered. He reminded her of Marinette, which made her smile. Those two needed to get together, whether they were Adrien and Marinette or Ladybug and Chat Noir. Oh god that was still weird to think about.

"Then let me be clear," she whispered, still smiling evilly, leaning in towards the blond model. "Marinette's bakery. Tomorrow. 6:00. You'll be on time and we'll go to the movies. It will be a magical evening. And you have to buy all the food. _Got it?_ "

"Got it..." he squeaked out.

"All Right!" Alya jumped up pounding her fist in the air. She was the best matchmaker ever. Marinette was going to owe her _big time._ "You're secret's safe with me, kitty-cat!" She assured Adrien, giving him a wink.

"Great…"

* * *

 _Saturday_

* * *

"I'm telling you Nino, those two are perfect for each other," Alya told her boyfriend over the phone as she picked out her outfit for her planned outing with Marinette and Adrien. _Ladybug and Chat Noir._ "And I'm getting close; I can feel it."

"I wouldn't be too sure," he responded. "Adrien is absolutely clueless. Also too in love with Lad-...another girl."

"Ladybug?" Alya pretended to guess, knowing full well about the lovesick cat's feelings about his partner.

"Aw dang, I promised Adrien I wouldn't tell anyone," Nino groaned. "Don't tell him that I let it slip."

"For sure," she responded. "I'm great at keeping secrets." _You have no idea._

"By the way...how the heck did you convince Adrien to come to the movies with you and Marinette today?"

"I have my ways."

"Also why wasn't I invited?" Nino asked, in a mock wounded tone. "You know how I am about my movies…"

"Those two crazy kids are having a movie date. I'm only there to supervise. Then about halfway through...I'll just forget that I had some important babysitting to do."

"I love your plan."

"Genius, right?"

* * *

 _Later_

* * *

"Curse all of you stupid akumas!" Alya screamed at the raging monster destroying the movie theater. They always had to come at the worst possible times! All she wanted was to get her OTP together...was that so much to ask? She was just about to excuse herself and leave the two of them alone when a giant popcorn bucket akuma came crashing through the movie screen.

"STOP SNEAKING IN FOOD, YOU LITTLE BRATS!" cried the akumatized employee. She glanced over at her two classmates and saw both of them subtly looking around for a place to hide and transform. _Oh. OH._ Alya got another terrible idea. _OH GOD I REALLY AM A GENIUS._

"We'd better find somewhere safe to hide!" she said loudly. She practically dragged Adrien and Marinette out of the theater and into a nearby utility closet. "Great! This works!" she exclaimed, shoving them both inside, slamming the door, and locking them in. Alya couldn't help but remember the time Marinette had locked in a cage with Nino during an attack, so maybe there was a bit of revenge to be found in it.

"Alya! ALYA! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!" Marinette's muffled yells only made Alya giggle harder. "Open up!"

"Relax Mari! Ladybug will take care of it!" she responded.

"Alya this closet is really cramped…" Adrien mumbled. _That's the point, you stupid cat._ She didn't respond, hoping that they would believe she had gone to go watch the fight.

"A-Adrien you should t-try to get out of here."

"And leave you here alone? No way."

"We-well I'm going to go find a better spot. To hide, that is. Not that this spot is bad! It's just kind of awkward. The situation is awkward. Not you! You're not awkward; you're gorgeous. I'm awkward. WAIT I MEAN-"

"Ladybug will handle it, Marinette. She always does."

"Why isn't Chat Noir there yet?" Alya heard Marinette mumble. There was more screaming from the theater. Alya hoped no one was getting hurt, but she was glad they started screaming; it certainly got their attention.

"Maybe he got held up," she heard Adrien say.

"Geez, he's never _this_ late to a battle."

"Marinette, are you a Chat Noir fan?" Alya could practically hear his smirk.

"I guess?" This wasn't going fast enough. Alya had to do something so they would suck it up and reveal themselves already!

"AHHHH! HELP ME! HOLY CRAP THE PAIN! LADYBUG! CHAT NOIR! HOLY CRAP COME HELP ME RIGHT NOW!" Alya screamed as loudly and frantically as she could without cracking up.

"That was Alya!" Adrien gasped.

"Chat Noir is probably on his way. She'll be fine!" Marinette responded.

"I'M NOT GOING TO BE FINE! OH GOD! PLEASE! THE PAAAAAAINN!"

"Screw it. Plagg! Transform me!" _Yes. YES. YUUUUUUSSSSSSS._

"Gah! A-Adrien? What? What the actual-" The door swung open as Chat Noir kicked it open and sprinted towards the movie theater, ready to fight. Marinette was still standing in the doorway of the closet, mouth wide open.

"Don't you need to transform to?" Alya asked her nonchalantly.

"What? How did-"

"Just go." _Yep. She was going to win best-friend-of-the-year award for this for sure._


	3. The Akuma Crisis

**Thanks so much for reviewing everyone! I love you all! Special shoutout to UmiNight Angel Neko for catching my little SAO abridged reference. (I couldn't resist; Asuna's threats are comedy gold.)**

 **This isn't a request (I'll get to them!) It's something I've been wanting to write for a while though. Anyway, Enjoy!**

 **(This started angsty and ended up weird)**

* * *

I felt like I was at my breaking point. This was the third week in a row that my Father had left unexpectedly for some business trip, leaving me parentless. But I was used to that. It wasn't like I ever saw him even when he was around. And even when I saw him, we never really _talked._ Father was more of...a boss, and I his employee. I gave a sigh. Why should I care that he wasn't around? Many other kids would give their right leg to have some weeks of freedom from their parents.

I couldn't help but let my mind drift to Marinette's parents. Gosh, they were so kind to me when I was over practicing for the Mega Strike III tournament with Marinette. They were generous and friendly and...well, it seemed like they were happy. Her house felt so warm and inviting every time I had visited, as Chat or as Adrien. I didn't get any love from my Father. If anything, we shared a sort of mutual respect. It was unfair.

Maybe that was why I was sitting alone in the park, under a tree. I had to make an effort to hold back tears, as I could feel them creeping at the corners of my eyes. I didn't want to break down. I couldn't give him the satisfaction. My mind drifted to the numerous amount of activities that filled my days in between school and photo shoots. I always had poured myself into everything, hoping that maybe, just once, I could impress him. Make him proud. If I just was the perfect son, I could win my Father's love. _But that's not going to happen,_ I thought. Finally giving in and letting some tears slip out when the horrible truth hit me. In the end, everything that I've worked for is worthless; nothing would get me closer to my Father. _Nothing would bring her back._

Wait...what's that? I jerked my head up to see a small black butterfly heading towards...me. No. Nonononononono! There was no way in _hell_ I was going to be akumatized. Oh crap...Oh crap! The evil little bug fluttered closer and closer. I quickly jumped up from my position under the tree and began running. The akuma flew faster. _Why the heck is this dang butterfly so fast?_ I continued to run through the park, dodging in and out of the trees, checking behind me every two seconds. Yep, it was still pursuing me with unusual endurance for such a delicate insect. _Ok Adrien, time for a new approach,_ I thought.

I spotted a tennis ball on the ground and chucked it at the akuma. It merely dodged the ball with ease. _Geez...Hawkmoth has got some athletic butterflies._ I began digging in my bag as I continued running, throwing my textbooks, pencils, and even my phone at the evil insect pursuing me. The stupid thing was still giving chase. My hand finally reached for a jar that I had been storing some cheese for Plagg in. (The cheese was obviously long gone.)

"Come at me you stupid bug!" I sneered at it, uncapping the jar, knowing I had it beat. That idiotic akuma didn't stop fluttering towards me. It didn't even slow down. Actually it flew right into the open jar. **Into** it. _I am such an idiot._ The akuma faded into the jar, which took on a purplish tint as all possessed objects did. _Oh crap Oh crap Oh crap!_

"Chat Blanc. I am-"

"SHUT UP, HAWKMOTH!" I yelled at the voice in my head. I was about to be akumatized. This was bad. This was really REALLY bad. I couldn't let my lady fight...well, me...all by herself! What if I hurt her? I wouldn't be there to help her or protect her!

"I am Hawk-"

"I know who you are!" I snapped at him. I needed to calm down. If I just stopped being angry, maybe I wouldn't get akumatized! _I'm not angry..._ I told myself. _I'm fine! Everything's fine! No need to turn into a monster or anything! No need to worry about the akuma in the jar that you are currently holding which is trying to possess you at this very moment so you can become Hawkmoth's meat puppet!_ I was just making it worse. I also became increasingly aware of my breaths, which were becoming shorter and more frantic. The akuma probably would have possessed me then and there if I hadn't seen my best friend walking, headphones on, on the other side of the park.

"OH GOD! NINO!" I yelled, sprinting over to my friend, causing him to yelp and jump back at my sudden appearance. "This is an emergency! You need to cheer me up right now!"

"What?" Nino looked more confused than concerned.

"You need to cheer me up ASAP! Seriously I'm begging you!"

"Dude. I've never seen you so freaked! What's this all about?" I held up the purplish jar, almost guiltily, and I saw my friend's eyes widen to the size of dinner plates.

"Is that an akuma?!" he yelled at me.

"Quiet!" I shushed Nino. "I don't want all of Paris knowing!"

"This is why you need cheering up?"

"Duh! I don't want to be akumatized!"

"I understand that," Nino said. "I don't remember anything from when I was akumatized, but Alya had videos. I looked freaking ridiculous! Can't let Hawkmoth mess up your face, man. I mean, you're a model. Your face is insured."

"I did see that video of you as a supervillain," I commented, trying to keep my mind off the dreaded thing in my right hand. "You looked hideous. Hawkmoth clearly has no sense of fashion."

"Speaking of him, can you hear his voice in your head?" Nino asked suddenly. I winced.

"I heard it a couple times before, but he's not talking anymore. I don't know if he will again. I just know that I have to get this akuma to Ladybug...somehow."

"We'll figure out how to get those two bugs to meet later," Nino said nonchalantly. "Right now we need to cheer you up."

"I think I'll be okay Nino," I reassured the DJ. "Just talking to you made Hawkmoth shut up, so maybe I'm cheered up enough."

"Blasphemy!" Nino shouted. "I am your best friend and it is my duty to effectively cheer you up. Come on, I know just the place…"

* * *

The line at the bakery was extremely long, but Nino insisted that it was the best in all of Paris. I knew this bakery, of course: Marinette's parents owned it. I had never actually tried any of their sweets before, not even when I was over training with Marinette for the Mega Strike III Tournament. _God, those cookies and croissants had looked sooo good…_ Suddenly, my face fell when I realized something. I was on a diet. All those tempting cakes, cookies, and pastries were only there to tantalize me. Stupid modeling. Stupid schedules. _Stupid Father._

"I will grant you the power to-"

"Shut up!" I yelled at Hawkmoth, pulling at my hair, drawing the attention of a few people in front of us. Nino shot me a panicked look.

"Happy thoughts, man! We're almost at the front of the line!"

"But I can't even get anything here, Nino! I have a very specific diet, remember?"

"Screw your freaking diet. The food here is heavenly," Nino said. "And you need to be cheered up pronto to avoid…" His gaze drifted to the jar in my hand. "...that." The line moved forward and we found ourselves at the front, finally. Marinette was just finishing up with the last customer.

"How can I help you today?" Marinette asked politely, focused on restocking the display.

"Hey Mari!" Nino greeted. Recognizing his voice, Marinette looked up, made eye contact with me, and abruptly dropped the plate of macaroons she was putting into the display window. She did some kind of weird spastic motion with her arms, clearly freaking out about something. Did she recognize that the jar I was holding was akumatized? I glanced down. No...there was no way she could see it from the counter. It was below her line of sight. Then...what was making her so nervous?

"A-A-A...Adr...Adr…" she stuttered.

"Are you okay, Marinette?" I asked her. If anything, that made it worse. Her face crimson red, Marinette slowly knelt down and picked up the fallen macaroons, muttering "Oh my god...oh my god...calm down! Calm down! Just say words! Words are good! Just talk like a normal person!...Oh god…" I probably wouldn't have even heard it were it not for the enhanced hearing I had gotten from being Chat. I didn't comment. After about a minute, Marinette slowly got up again, avoiding eye contact and still blushing profusely.

"Wh-what are you guys doing here?" she asked with a forced giggle.

"I am on a mission!" Nino announced. "I'm here to cheer up my boy Adrien! It's my duty as his best bro. I need your best pastry, stat!"

Marinette walked over to the display case, her expression taking on a slight pout as she considered her options. It was freaking adorable. She finally settled on a single-serve Ladybug cake, which she carefully put into a box and brought back over to the register. Which reminded me.

"I'll be right back Nino," I said, pulling out a $20 and handing it to him. "I'll meet you in a second." I had to contact Ladybug.

"No way am I letting you pay for your own cheering-up present, man," Nino replied, pushing the money back towards me. "I've got it."

"It's okay!" Marinette blurted out. "It's on the house! I hope...you are better...I mean feel better...Adrien...yeah." I shot her a smile before heading towards the bathroom. I transformed and leaped out the window, using my staff to call Ladybug. Then again. And again. There was no response. She was probably busy with something. _I probably should have known she wouldn't answer. Maybe she's not even busy. She's probably just ignoring me. Just like everyone else in my life does. I'm so tired of-_

"I AM HAWKMOTH AND I WILL GRANT YOU THE POWER-"

"I AM CHAT NOIR AND I TOLD YOU TO SUCK IT!" I decided I would call her later. I released my transformation, hopped back through the window, and walked out of the bathroom toward Nino, who was waiting for me at the front.

"Did you hear something?" Nino asked me. "It sounded like shouting coming from outside."

"No," I lied. "Probably wasn't important though. Your house or mine?"

"Mine of course," Nino answered. "You and I are having a movie marathon."

* * *

I tried to watch _Monty Python and the Holy Grail_ with Nino but I just couldn't stop glancing at the stupid jar I was holding. Nino noticed this of course, and abruptly paused the movie. I honestly hadn't been following it very well though...there was something about swallows...I think. And French people throwing cows. ...Yeah. I wasn't really sure what to think about that.

"Dude if you aren't going to appreciate this cinematic masterpiece than you have a serious problem," Nino said.

"It's an akuma!" I exclaimed. "Of course it's a serious problem!"

"Why don't you just...I don't know...put down the jar?"

"I can't do that!" I responded. "The akuma will just go possess someone else! Or some other object I'm holding!"

"You could make a post on the Ladyblog! I'm pretty sure Ladybug reads it, and you can go meet up with her and have her cleanse it for you."

"Nino do you know how many people go on Alya's blog?" I asked in a panic. "A lot! That would be..embarrassing!"

"It's not that big of a deal, Adrien," Nino said. "Everyone in class except you and Marinette has been akumatized! We've all been through it; no one will think less of you for it. Man...we should really start a support group. You think people would join?"

"I don't know. Maybe some of them."

"I can picture it now!" Nino said with a laugh. "Raise your hand if you have ever been personally victimized by Chloe Bourgeois!"

"What?"

" _Mean Girls_?" He asked, shaking his head. I shrugged. "Dude you need to see more movies."

"Maybe another time. You know, when I'm not on the brink of becoming a horrific monster."

"I'm going to go get more food while it's paused," Nino said. "Don't you dare become depressed while I'm done."

As soon as he left, I ran outside again, transformed, and called Ladybug again. This time, thankfully, she picked up.

"Chat Noir!" Ladybug greeted. "I'm sorry I couldn't call you back sooner! What's wrong? Is there an akuma?"

"No," I answered. "I mean...yes? Kind of?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, looking suspicious.

"Ugh, you'll see. Meet me by the Eiffel Tower as soon as you can! It's kind of urgent." I hung up before my Lady could respond, instead running as fast as I could to the rendezvous point. I wasn't sure how long I could go on resisting this akuma.

* * *

"Alright," Ladybug said through pants, landing next to me where I was standing near the tower. "What's this all about?" I held up the jar sheepishly. Ladybug looked confused, then after a few seconds her expression morphed into one of horror. "An AKUMA?"

"Yeah," was all I could say, wincing yet again.

"You almost got yourself akumatized? You idiot!" _She's right, I am an idiot. Ladybug would never get herself akumatized. She's strong. You're the weak side of the team. She probably doesn't even need you-_

"I AM HAWKMOTH AND YOU-"

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! OH MY GOD, I DON'T CARE!" I yelled. Ladybug smacked her hand over my mouth, seeing as I had started some nearby civilians.

"Who are you yelling at?" she whisper yelled at me.

"The stupid voice in my head," I deadpanned.

"Oh."

"Can you cleanse the akuma already?"

"Yes! Okay! Geez!" I dropped the jar on the ground and it shattered, releasing the akuma. Ladybug threw her yoyo and caught it, cleansing it before letting it flutter off into the sky.

"Go f*** yourself little butterfly," I said, mocking Ladybug's usual farewell. She frowned at me.

"Chat, it's not the butterfly's fault."

"Well unless you can drag Hawkmoth here so I can tell it to him, this will have to do!"

If I hadn't yelled at Hawkmoth talking in my head, Alya probably wouldn't have started filming. But she did. And now my little freakout was trending. So obviously Nino drew the conclusion.

"So." Nino said, awkwardly.

"Yeah…"

"Chat Noir, huh?" I nodded.

"I was wondering why you disappeared from my house and never came back after I got food."

"Oh yeah," I said, forcibly laughing. "I kinda...forgot about that."

"Yeah. You were busy shouting crude words to a poor innocent butterfly to remember you're best friend. Yep, we've all been there."

"So."

"So."

"Does this mean I can join your post-akuma support group?" I asked, jokingly.

"No way man! No superheroes allowed! Who do you think you are?"

"Geez the way you put it, it sound like you're planning an uprising."

"Maybe I am." Nino raised his eyebrows playfully.

"..."

"..."

"So...you wanna talk about this...or…"

"Serious talks can wait. Movies now."

 **Please review! :)**


	4. The Competition (Part 1)

AN: Sorry for the mini-hiatus. I have no good reason for it. (ORIGINALLY POSTED ON TUMBLR)

"How can you even SUGGEST such a thing?" Chat Noir asked his partner. It seemed so out of character for Ladybug to act this unprofessional on a night patrol.

"God! Calm down! I'm not saying we do it now. It's just...there may come a time in the future where I get tired keeping our identities secret from each other. And wouldn't it be more fun that way?"

Chat Noir's eye widened in surprise. Rational, level-headed Ladybug would never make such a suggestion. Right? And surely his headstrong lady would never dream of breaking her own rule and allowing them to share identities! Except that was exactly what she was doing. And she didn't want them to just share names or drop transformations. Ladybug wanted to make it a _competition_.

"I guess," he finally responded. "But I still don't think it's a good idea."

"Oh yeah?" Ladybug challenged, placing a hand on her hip. "And why's that?" Chat Noir smirked and leaned in towards Ladybug, settling at a heavily flirtatious distance.

"Because I would win," he whispered.

"In your dreams, Tomcat," Ladybug giggled, pushing his face away. "I could find you right away if I was looking. I'm sure if I ever saw you as a civilian, I'd recognize you right away. After all, it can only be so hard to find a blonde guy with green eyes who flirts and makes terrible puns."

"Really?" he said in mock surprise. He shook his head and clicked his tongue. "Ladybug...Ladybug...the only problem with that is that you have seen me before."

"Seeing you in a crowd doesn't count."

"Did I say you saw me in a crowd?"

"What? No way!" she objected, punching his shoulder, apparently a bit too hard judging by Chat's pained expression and slight yelp.

"Well I know for sure that I would recognize your radiant beauty if I saw you without your mask, my Lady."

"In your dreams!" she retorted playfully. "You know what? Let's do it. We'll try to find out each other's identities, and the winner will forever have bragging rights."

"You're on!" The challenge was sealed with a signature fist bump. Ladybug swung away with a smirk and Chat Noir turned around to head home and string together all the evidence he could find. He was going to win this.

The very next night, Marinette sat on top of the building they had designated as their meeting place, waiting for her partner to arrive for patrol. She had spent most of her day at school thinking about Chat Noir and what his secret identity might be. Ladybug knew that it was likely they went to the same school, and that narrowed the pool of potential candidates immensely. Not that she felt any closer. Ok, so maybe she had a been a touch overconfident last night.

"Hey Ladybug!" And, speak of the devil; her partner vaulted up and landed beside her with grace. He shot her a mischievous smile. "Is your dad a baker? Because you have some nice buns." Used to her partner's antics, Ladybug rolled her eyes.

"Learned a new pick up line, have you?" she asked him. "Flattery will get you nowhere, Chat Noir. I'm not going to go easy on you; I play to win." Instead of immediately responding with another equally ridiculous line, Chat Noir stopped, looking taken aback and a little confused. But then he shook himself a bit and allowed his usual grin to creep back across his face.

"Well, I just have to say, My Lady, that you look so beautiful, I think I want to marry you."

"That's great, Chat," she said, grabbing her yo-yo and preparing to swing away and start the patrol.

"I want to MARI you."

"I heard you the first time!" she responded, a bit more annoyance creeping into her voice.

"MARI."

"Chat, we really don't have time for-"

"MARINETTE DUPAIN-CHENG."

That got her attention. She turned back to stare at him, mouth opening and closing, almost as if she were impersonating a fish. Chat Noir awkwardly looked away and scratched the back of his neck, looking sheepish. "It _is_ Marinette, isn't it." It wasn't a question. If anything, her reaction was confirmation.

"H-how do you-"

"I guess this means I win, huh?" he said, grinning at her and looking very pleased with himself. "And you were so sure you would win too…"

"Alright, wise guy," Ladybug said, finally reorienting herself after the revelation. "How'd you figure it out? In one day?"

"Well, I had already all but figured out you go to my school...I'm sure you realized the same about me. Then I just had to narrow it down. And I stumbled upon someone who fit the bill perfectly. Same pigtails, same eyes, same freckles...the same bravery, leadership, and…" He gave a small chuckle. "..competitiveness."

Damnit, why couldn't Ladybug stop herself from blushing?

"It's not like I figured it out instantly. I had to..sort through...some evidence by hanging it all up. I had to ask my father for more red yarn when I ran out. He think I'm into knitting now, so that's a thing."

"I still can't believe you won!" Ladybug raged. "And I don't even know who the heck you are…"

"Well you deserve to know, Marinette," Chat Noir said, gently grabbing her hand. "Should I just drop my transformation or-"

"No."

"Huh?" Chat Noir raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Why-"

"I'm gonna figure it out! No hints! And definitely don't just tell me-what's the fun in that?"

"Well, okay," Chat Noir said, smiling, but looking more than a little disappointed. "But be quick about it. The anticipation is killing me."

"Yeah, me too," Ladybug giggled, booping her partner's nose playfully. "But I know I can find you out by the end of the week, tops."

"We'll see about that," Chat Noir responded. Then the duo took off into the night, feeling a bit more in sync, and a bit more intimate. _Not such a crazy suggestion after all._


	5. The Competition (Part 2)

Marinette paced the length of her room with vehement determination. Each time foot met floorboard her steps became a little less precise and a little more violent. After a few lengths, she was seething with rage. It was a bit of a childish display, perhaps, taking out her frustration on her innocent floor, but Marinette Dupain-Cheng, part-time heroine of Paris, was officially at her wit's end.

Finally flopping onto her bed with a huff, Marinette let out a long, exasperated groan into her pillows. As much as she would have loved to blame someone or an invisible force for her misery, she knew full well that it was self-imposed.

She had decided to challenge Chat Noir to a competition, because she was sure that she could figure out his identity before he could ever figure out hers.

The bastard figured it out in _one day._

Marinette grabbed the small Chat Noir plush from the corner of her bed and glared at it. The plush smiled back at her, the signature Chat Noir smirk stiched permanently onto its felt complexion.

"Stop mocking me!" she hissed at it, throwing it back in the corner. She allowed her head to drop like an anchor back into her pillows and thought back to her fruitless attempts over the last couple days to figure out her partner's identity.

From what Chat had said at patrol 3 days ago, it seemed that he was someone who knew her, at least as an acquaintance. And he had stated outright that they went to the same school so…

Marinette bolted upright and ran over to her desk, lifting piles of sketches and pulling out last year's yearbook. She hadn't looked at it since school ended in June and had nearly forgotten about it. She then ran across her room and found her backpack, rummaging through it to find a thick red Sharpie. As much as she lamented defacing a book full of memories, she knew it was for the good of the investigation.

"Marinette!" A small bell-like voice interrupted her thoughts. Tikki floated up and rested on the cover of the yearbook, pouting slightly. "It's 10:15. You're late for your patrol!"

"I can't go yet!" Marinette protested. "I still haven't figured out who Chat Noir is! Hell, I'm not even close! I can't face him yet!"

"Don't worry about that, Marinette," Tikki giggled. "He told you he couldn't make patrol tonight during the akuma attack this morning. He's busy! Don't you remember?"

Marinette may have been too busy over-analyzing her partner's every move in a desperate attempt to draw a conclusion to actually pay attention to what he was saying.

"Alright, alright, I'm going," Marinette responded. "Tikki, spots on!" She grabbed the sharpie and yearbook before she swung away out of her window. Who said she couldn't multitask?

First, she crossed out the faces of every girl so she could see her options more clearly. Next came all the boys who had been akuma victims. Obviously, she couldn't remember them all, but she was still able to narrow down the pool quite a bit. Next, she eliminated boys based off appearances. Of course, she only crossed out those who looked absolutely nothing like Chat Noir, since she wasn't sure which features were possibly changed by his transformation. So far, so good.

Ladybug sat near the top of the Eiffel Tower, haunched over the yearbook for about an hour, eliminating boy after boy for various reasons. _Too quiet, too short_ , and when she looked at Adrien, _too perfect in every way._

Ladybug crossed off yet another face, her sharpie running low on ink. She then groaned in anger and let her face drop on the pages of the book. What had she missed? _She had crossed off every single boy in the school._

"What are you doing?"

"Ahhhhhh!" Ladybug screamed involuntary, startled by the sudden appearance of her leather-clad partner. In a clumsy motion, she fumbled to grab her yearbook before it fell out of her arms and finally hugged it close to her chest, breathing heavily. Then she turned back to glare at Chat Noir. "How many times have I told you not to sneak up on me like that!" she raged.

"Sorry!" he said sheepishly. Then he raised his right hand. "I swear that next time, I will make all kinds of noise as I approach to save you from a potential heart attack, Marinette."

She rolled her eyes. Of course he would call her by name just to rub in the fact that he won easily while she was still struggling.

"What were you doing?" he asked again. Then he leaned over her shoulder. "Is that a yearbook?" Marinette was too embarrassed to tell him that she was not even close to figuring out his identity.

"I thought you said you were busy tonight," she said instead.

"Finished early," he said simply. "Don't tell me you _still_ haven't figured it out!" he added, voice laced with amusement. "Do you want a hint or-"

"I don't need hints!" she snapped. "I just…uh…" She flipped through the pages of crossed-out faces. "…hit a dead end." Chat Noir walked over and sat down next to her, green eyes scanning the page.

"Well, how about this," he said. "Go through the last couple candidates you crossed out and explain why you did. If you talk through it, maybe you'll find your mistake." That…wasn't a bad idea. And staring at the last page of the school photos like it insulted her wasn't getting her anywhere.

So, starting with the Zs, Ladybug explained to her partner why she'd ruled out boy after boy. Sometimes Chat Noir would point out specific classmates and ask why they had been eliminated.

"Ok, what about Jean Duparc?"

"Akumatized."

"Justin Extra?"

"I've literally never spoken to him, and you seem to know me pretty well."

"I'm pretty sure I'm actually Nathaniel Kurtzberg."

"Ok first of all, you were literally with me the whole time he was akumatized, and on top of that, there is no way someone so shy would act as ridiculous as you do."

They went through page after page until they reached the beginning. Marinette felt the sting of defeat once again. Had she missed him? Was she just that oblivious?

"What about Adrien Agreste?" Ladybug tried–and failed—to keep from laughing.

"Ha! Yeah right!" she said. "As if!"

"Why not?" he laughed back. "I've got the looks."

"There's no way!" Ladybug continued laughing. "I mean he's so perfect, right? And so handsome, and funny, and selfless…and…" _Wait_ , she thought.

 _Fuck. Fuuuuuuuuuuck._

"OH MY GOD YOU'RE HIM, AREN'T YOU?" And all the pieces simultaneously fell into place. How? How had she missed that? She looked over at Chat Noir, and it was like she was seeing him for the first time. She saw those same kind, emerald eyes under the mask. Adrien's beautiful golden locks, which usually fell perfectly, were messy and wild, made all the more tantalizing. The same (super hot) boy who had stolen her heart with a simple act of kindness, even when he thought she hated him, was the same brave and altruistic superhero she was lucky enough to call a partner.

And he loved her.

"Hi, Marinette," he breathed. Marinette knew she should say something, but she couldn't even begin to form words. Ladybug was a woman of action. So she grabbed Adrien by the shoulders and kissed him softly. And there was no need for words, nor could they ever describe something that felt so right.

Thanks for reading! Reviews are greatly appreciated! :)


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